The Ideal Number of Friends for Kids

Experts say quality, not quantity, matters most when it comes to childhood friendships.

Published on Feb. 15, 2026

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According to psychologist Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Ph.D., the number of friends a child has is less important than the quality of those friendships. What matters most is that a child has at least one friend they connect with and feel accepted by. Maintaining close, authentic connections with many friends can be overwhelming for kids, so one or two good friends are often enough. The key is ensuring those friendships are kind, low-conflict, and allow the child to feel safe, understood and valued.

Why it matters

Childhood friendships are crucial for developing social skills, building confidence and even improving academic performance. However, experts caution that more friends are not always better. Having too many friends can increase pressure to fit in and manage group dynamics, which can be stressful for some kids. Focusing on quality over quantity when it comes to friendships is important for a child's overall wellbeing.

The details

According to Dr. Kennedy-Moore, the ideal number of friends for a child depends on the child's personality. More extroverted kids may thrive in larger friend groups, while introverted children often prefer a smaller number of close, intimate friendships. The key is ensuring those friendships are healthy, with kindness, minimal conflict and a sense of feeling accepted. For younger kids, friendships are about play and fun, while older children seek more emotional intimacy and trust. Maintaining many close friendships can be overwhelming, so one or two good friends are often sufficient.

  • This article was published on February 15, 2026.

The players

Eileen Kennedy-Moore

A psychologist and author of "Kid Confidence: Help Your Child Make Friends, Build Resilience, and Develop Real Self-Esteem."

Dr. Friendtastic

A podcast where Dr. Kennedy-Moore answers kids' real friendship questions.

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What they’re saying

“It's really kind of what floats your kid's boat and what feels good to them. More extroverted kids are going to enjoy the big friend group, while more introverted kids will prefer a smaller number of more intimate friendships, and we don't need to attach values to one or the other.”

— Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Psychologist and author (Good Housekeeping)

“When I have a family in my practice, my diagnostic question is, 'Does this kid have somebody to sit with at lunch who they like and likes them back?' If the answer is yes, they're doing okay. There's no magic number.”

— Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Psychologist and author (Good Housekeeping)

The takeaway

The number of friends a child has is less important than the quality of those friendships. What matters most is that a child has at least one friend they connect with and feel accepted by, rather than maintaining a large group of friends. Focusing on healthy, low-conflict relationships that allow a child to feel safe, understood and valued is key for their social and emotional development.