Advice Columnist Urges Man to Move On From Cheating Ex

R. Eric Thomas cautions against taking back a partner who has broken trust.

Published on Mar. 4, 2026

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A man writes to advice columnist R. Eric Thomas, asking whether he should forgive his ex-wife who cheated on him and now wants him back. Thomas advises the man to move on, noting that the couple likely should not have been married in the first place and that the ex-wife's continued desire to maintain a separate apartment does not bode well for a reconciliation.

Why it matters

This advice column highlights the difficult decision people face when a former partner who has broken trust wants to reconcile. It explores the complex emotions and practical considerations involved in deciding whether to give someone a second chance after infidelity.

The details

The man was previously married to a woman who cheated on him. After divorcing her, she reached out and admitted to the infidelity, asking for forgiveness. However, the man questions her commitment, as she wants to maintain a separate apartment. The advice columnist, R. Eric Thomas, suggests the man should 'move on' since the couple likely should not have been married in the first place, and the ex-wife's actions do not indicate she is fully committed to making the relationship work.

  • The man divorced his ex-wife several months ago.

The players

R. Eric Thomas

An advice columnist who responds to the man's letter.

The man

A previously married man whose ex-wife cheated on him and now wants him back.

The ex-wife

A woman who cheated on her husband and is now seeking his forgiveness and a reconciliation, but wants to maintain a separate apartment.

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What they’re saying

“To quote the song from the musical 'Sunday in the Park with George,' move on.”

— R. Eric Thomas, Advice Columnist (oregonlive.com)

The takeaway

This advice column highlights the importance of carefully considering whether to reconcile with a former partner who has broken trust, even if they are seeking forgiveness. The columnist's recommendation to 'move on' suggests that the man should prioritize his own wellbeing and not feel obligated to take back his ex-wife, especially given the lack of clear commitment on her part.