Writer Reveals Family Secrets in Memoir About Larger-Than-Life Father

Tom Junod's new book "In the Days of My Youth I Was Told What It Means to Be a Man" explores his complicated relationship with his charismatic, philandering father.

Published on Mar. 6, 2026

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Acclaimed magazine writer Tom Junod has spent decades writing profiles that were really about his own father, Lou Junod, a traveling handbag salesman with an elaborate grooming routine and a penchant for philandering. Now, Junod has written a 404-page memoir that delves into his father's hidden past, including revelations about his real identity, affairs, and the emotional toll his behavior took on the family.

Why it matters

Junod's memoir provides a rare, intimate look at the complex dynamics between a father and son, and how a parent's actions can reverberate through generations. It also sheds light on the challenges of maintaining privacy and truth-telling as a high-profile journalist writing about one's own family.

The details

Junod discovered shocking secrets about his father while researching the book, including that Lou Junod was actually born Lou Scharnberger and may have had an illegitimate child with a woman he was having an affair with. Junod also reveals that he himself cheated on his wife in 1996 after a weekend trip with his father, mirroring his father's own infidelities.

  • Lou Junod died in 2006 at the age of 87.
  • Tom Junod published the profile "My Father's Fashion Tips" about his father in GQ in 1996.
  • Junod confessed his own affair to his wife more than 20 years after it happened, while writing the book.

The players

Tom Junod

A celebrated magazine writer who has spent much of his career writing profiles that were really about his complicated relationship with his father, Lou Junod.

Lou Junod

Tom Junod's father, a charismatic and philandering traveling handbag salesman who crafted an elaborate personal style and grooming routine.

Janet Junod

Tom Junod's wife of more than 40 years.

Peggy

A woman with whom Lou Junod had a long-term affair, and with whom he may have had a child.

David Granger

The former editor-in-chief of Esquire, who hired Tom Junod as a marquee writer.

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What they’re saying

“You heard him, you smelled him, you loved him, you hated him, you feared him. You laughed at his stories. You wanted to be in those stories. You knew that you were holding up your existence as a man against the standard that he set, and you knew that he was also scrutinizing you. It was a continual … assault is not the right word, but it comes close.”

— Tom Junod (New York Times)

“Lou lit up a room when he walked in. Took it over. And he liked it that way.”

— Janet Junod, Tom Junod's wife (New York Times)

“I'd never read anything like it. It was alive. Like so many of Tom's stories, it's never about one thing. It wasn't just about eating oysters. It was about the state of our civilization.”

— David Granger, Former editor-in-chief of GQ (New York Times)

What’s next

Junod's memoir "In the Days of My Youth I Was Told What It Means to Be a Man" is set to be released on April 15, 2026.

The takeaway

Junod's deeply personal memoir about his complicated relationship with his father offers a rare, unflinching look at the lasting impact a parent's actions can have on their children, even decades later. It also highlights the challenges journalists face in balancing their professional obligations with their personal lives when writing about their own families.