Choosing Discipline Over Regret in Life

Former Duke goalkeeper reflects on the power of daily discipline to shape our lives

Published on Feb. 24, 2026

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In a recent newsletter, former NFL athlete John Welbourne shared the insight that "You can suffer from discipline or you can suffer from regret. There is no third option." Former Duke goalkeeper E.J. Proctor expands on this idea, arguing that small daily choices to be disciplined in areas like work, relationships, and personal goals can lead to better long-term outcomes than the temporary suffering of giving in to temptation or distraction.

Why it matters

Proctor's perspective challenges the notion that discipline is always a burden, showing how it can actually be a path to becoming the person we hope to be. In an era of instant gratification, her message about the value of delayed gratification and aligning our daily choices with our aspirations resonates.

The details

Proctor draws on her experience as a collegiate and professional athlete, where discipline in training, nutrition, and focus was key to success. She argues this principle applies equally to work, relationships, and personal development - the small daily choices we make either move us closer to or further from our goals. While discipline may cause "momentary suffering," Proctor believes it has the potential for greater long-term payoff than the suffering of regret.

  • Proctor's reflections were prompted by a recent newsletter from former NFL player John Welbourne.

The players

E.J. Proctor

A former Duke University goalkeeper who went on to play professionally with the Utah Royals FC. She is now assisting with coaching youth soccer players and working as a physical therapist in her hometown of Wilson, North Carolina.

John Welbourne

A former NFL athlete who now runs a training program and facility called 'Power Athlete' and is known for his no-nonsense approach to training and nutrition.

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What they’re saying

“You can suffer from discipline or you can suffer from regret. There is no third option, sadly.”

— John Welbourne, Former NFL athlete (Power Athlete newsletter)

“Sometimes, it is hard to say no in the moment and it's often hard to remain focused at work or to stay diligent and hold ourselves accountable to our own personal, physical, spiritual, and financial goals, and these may take momentary suffering. But look at where we could end up. Would we not rather have the option of getting closer to who we hope to become with every small choice, than to look back and wonder why we chose things that brought us farther from that?”

— E.J. Proctor, Former Duke goalkeeper (wilsontimes.com)

The takeaway

Proctor's message is a powerful reminder that the small daily choices we make, whether in our personal lives or professional pursuits, have a profound impact on our long-term trajectory. By embracing discipline over short-term gratification, we can steadily align ourselves with the people we aspire to become, rather than facing the regret of missed opportunities and unfulfilled potential.