Pilates Becomes Unexpected Dating Trend

The workout once associated with 'Sex and the City' now sparks debates about gender, bodies, and relationships online.

Apr. 16, 2026 at 11:04pm

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A brightly colored, high-contrast silkscreen print of a Pilates Reformer machine repeated in a tight grid pattern, representing the workout's transformation into a cultural symbol beyond just fitness.The Pilates workout, once a symbol of aspirational urban femininity, has become a cultural touchstone for online debates about gender, dating, and identity.Atlanta Today

Pilates, the low-impact workout created by Joseph Pilates in 1926, has seen a resurgence in popularity in recent years. However, the conversation around Pilates has shifted beyond just fitness, with the workout being recast as a symbol of ideal femininity and dating preferences on social media and reality TV. Some men are promoting the idea of the 'Pilates wife,' framing women who attend classes as inherently more 'wholesome,' disciplined or desirable, which has been read as part of a broader 'manosphere' narrative. Experts argue this interpretation says more about internet culture than the workout itself, as Pilates has become a highly visible fitness trend that is being used to reinforce rigid gender roles, while others are quietly breaking them down.

Why it matters

The resurgence of Pilates reflects a mix of accessibility, celebrity influence, and shifting fitness preferences. However, the current discourse, with its emphasis on femininity and desirability, is just the latest layer. The risk is in treating that layer as the whole picture, as it can discourage people from engaging with Pilates on their own terms. The conversation around Pilates highlights how online debates can flatten and amplify meanings, turning a workout into a 'dog whistle' or a 'green flag' depending on who's doing the talking.

The details

Pilates, which was once shorthand for the aspirational urban woman of the late '90s and early 2000s, has become a part of discussions about dating preferences, gender politics, and misogynistic rhetoric online. In recent months, this conversation has spilled into reality TV, with a viral moment from 'Love Is Blind' capturing a male contestant breaking up with his fiancée, citing a lack of physical attraction and a preference for 'somebody who does f***ing Pilates every day.' On TikTok and other social media platforms, male creators have begun promoting the idea of the 'Pilates wife,' framing women who attend classes as inherently more 'wholesome,' disciplined or desirable.

  • Pilates was created by Joseph Pilates in 1926.
  • Pilates became a staple for the likes of Samantha Jones of 'Sex and the City' in the late '90s and early 2000s.
  • The recent conversation around Pilates and dating preferences has emerged in the past several months, including a viral moment from season 10 of 'Love Is Blind' in 2026.

The players

Joseph Pilates

The creator of the Pilates workout method in 1926.

Samantha Jones

A character from the TV series 'Sex and the City' who was associated with Pilates in the late '90s and early 2000s.

Mikala Jamison

A health and culture writer who has analyzed the wavering popularity of Pilates over time and how it's become shorthand for 'hot woman' in the media.

Kemberly Deane

The founder of Kinfolk Pilates in Atlanta, Georgia, who works with professional athletes on injury prevention, mobility, and recovery using Pilates.

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What they’re saying

“There are people that are sort of signaling this lately on my feed, that there's this right-wing takeover of Pilates, or that Pilates necessarily has something to do with, like, tradwifery. But lots of different people do lots of different exercises for lots of different reasons, and I think Pilates is just really visible.”

— Mikala Jamison, Health and culture writer

“It's definitely a thing in the Pilates world, this narrative of being a Pilates princess, and it being something very dainty, very cute and pink. There's this entire boom around it, but a lot of it is a misconception. People don't really understand what Pilates is.”

— Kemberly Deane, Founder of Kinfolk Pilates

The takeaway

The resurgence of Pilates today reflects a mix of accessibility, celebrity influence, and shifting fitness preferences. However, the current discourse, with its emphasis on femininity and desirability, is just the latest layer. The risk is in treating that layer as the whole picture, as it can discourage people from engaging with Pilates on their own terms. The conversation around Pilates highlights how online debates can flatten and amplify meanings, turning a workout into a 'dog whistle' or a 'green flag' depending on who's doing the talking.