Estranged Husband Refuses to Share Details of Serious Medical Condition

Woman seeks information to help her and their children cope with the situation.

Published on Feb. 10, 2026

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A woman whose husband has been diagnosed with a serious medical issue is frustrated that he is refusing to share details with her, even though they have two children together - one of whom has significant mental health challenges. She feels it's important for her to be informed so she can offer support and help their children deal with the situation, but her estranged husband won't provide the information.

Why it matters

The woman's concern stems from the fact that one of their children has multiple mental health diagnoses and is struggling, with no other family or friends for support. Knowing the details of the husband's condition could help the woman better assist her children through this difficult time.

The details

The couple's 20-year-old and 22-year-old children are not on speaking terms, so they can't discuss the issue with each other. One of the children, who is 20 and lives at home, has been diagnosed with autism, ADHD, PTSD and major depressive disorder, and has been hospitalized multiple times in the past five years. The woman feels it's important for her to be informed about her estranged husband's medical condition in order to offer support and help her children cope.

  • The husband was recently diagnosed with a serious medical issue, likely life-threatening.

The players

Dan

The woman's estranged husband who has been diagnosed with a serious medical condition.

The woman

The letter writer who is seeking information about her estranged husband's medical condition in order to support their children.

The couple's 20-year-old child

One of the couple's two children, diagnosed with autism, ADHD, PTSD and major depressive disorder, who has been hospitalized multiple times in the past five years.

The couple's 22-year-old child

The other child of the couple, who is not on speaking terms with their sibling.

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What they’re saying

“I am not being nosy; I simply believe that I should be aware of what's going on for the sake of our children.”

— The woman (oregonlive.com)

“Believe me, you have my sympathy.”

— Dear Abby (oregonlive.com)

The takeaway

This situation highlights the challenges that can arise when estranged spouses face a serious medical issue, especially when there are children involved who are also struggling. Open communication and cooperation between the parents, even in difficult circumstances, can be crucial for supporting the whole family.